McCain and God are White?

Posted on 20 February 2008                                                                             AddThis Social Bookmark Button   Print Posts

By John Sammon

 Columnist - John Sammon
Columnist - John Sammon. Click to view larger picture.Okay. In the Democrat party…..it’s now down to two. You might say it’s Bama versus Maa-ma, or Bama versus Billary.

I said earlier it’s impossible for Barack Obama to become president because he is African American. America is still a racist country and how many votes does he think he’s going to get in places like Buell, Idaho?

They’ve never seen an African American except on re-runs of Cosby.

That was before I factored in the novelty vote. Young people and immigrants are voting for Bama by the thousands. I forgot about the novelty. These young people never voted before, were never interested before.

They still don’t study the issues (who does?). But they know one thing.

Bama looks different. He acts different.

All these over two hundred years we’ve had mostly angry looking little short white guys for president, little midget white guys (excepting Abe Lincoln, Lyndon Johnson and three hundred pound William Howard Taft).

The Republicans are sticking with tradition. Their candidate, John McCain, is an angry, short, little white guy. He talks mean. He talks tough.

He talks about bombing enemies, potential or otherwise. He has God on his side because God is white.

White like McCain. God is a Republican. God is a man too.

So much for Billary Clinton.

Even now, the drooling sharks in the Republican Party, sensing red meat, are sharpening their pencils to smear Bama…should he somehow succeed. They’ll have to be careful. If their attacks are too mean spirited like normal…they could be accused of being a bunch of angry religious white guys.

They could even be called racist. Even the meanest member of the Ku Klux Clan doesn’t like that tag.

The Republicans will win because God is white. God is a man. The Democrats, the party of drugs and sodomy, have neither God, nor a white man. You may be asking, how do Republicans know God is white? When Charlton Heston talked to God as Moses with that burning bush scene, was that a black light?

No. White.

Look at the actors, Jeff Hunter, Max Von Sydow. They had skin so white it practically glows in the dark. They played Jesus, the son of God. You think God is a black guy with a white son?

C’mon!

I will say this about McCain. Though he is white and a man like God, he is much shorter than Charlton Heston. You can’t have everything.

But he’s got everything else going for him. He’s been in the real military (not like George Bush). Bama and Billary haven’t. He’s white just like all the guys before. He talks mean and tough which convinces all the rednecks he knows what he’s doing (in fact even McCain isn’t conservative enough for the lunatic fringe of the right wing as represented by commentators Husky Limbaugh and Anne The Red Baron Coulter).

McCain should win hands down….if it weren’t for those damn kids. They never took an interest in politics before. They never even voted. During the falsehood selling of the Iraq War, they ignored it.

The Republicans depend on complacency and apathy and low voter turnout among people of the wrong (to them) color. Who knew they would turn out in droves to vote for a candidate (Bama) based on the novelty of him. Something different.

You’d think they don’t like short angry white guys anymore. Or God, and the Republicans.

© Copyright 2008 by SammonSays.com

REFERENCES:

1. Run Down on the Candidates
2. Obama Regrets

Welcome, The Black President of the United States of America (You are long overdue)

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This post was written by:

John Sammon - who has written 28 posts on PoliticalArticles.NET.

John Sammon is the author of two books and writes a weekly humor column you may access at Sammonsays.com.

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