Columnist – John Sammon
I vividly recall John F. Kennedy just a month before his assassination telling Walter Cronkite something to the effect that, “what is great about this country is, that we don’t have to import our way of life onto other countries by the use of force.”

This was just moments before he said what had to be the most chilling of all ironies, that “in Vietnam, we can’t fight their war for them. We can help them, but they have to do the fighting.” In light of what eventually happened, it makes you sick.

Now comes a Newsweek Magazine cover-page headline trumpeting “Victory at Last, The Emergence of a Democratic Iraq.” The headline makes me sick.

Iraq is a war crime. A genocide. Initiated under false pretenses. A million-and-a-half Iraqis were killed in this obscenity, not to mention several-thousand Americans. Here are ten reasons why Newsweek is wrong:

  1.   Whatever Iraq is, right now, at this moment, is only because it’s backed up with American guns. Pull American troops out, and what have you got? A mystery. The notion that once American troops pull out the puppet regime we set up will be “Democratic,” and that once we pull out the country will remain peaceful, is presumed and wishful thinking at best, downright delusional at worst.

  2.   To maintain control in Iraq, we have to stay, and rule it as a colony like Puerto Rico.

  3.   We killed 1.5 million Iraqis, most of them innocent people including women and children, in a war that was launched to take out weapons of mass destruction that didn’t exist. As it became clear they didn’t exist, the government kept changing the reasons for the war, from a crusade to end violence in Iraq, to a noble exercise to establish Democracy. This ignored the reality; the war was planned long before 9-11 as a regime change to get rid of a troublesome dictator we had formerly befriended, supplied and encouraged, and to grab his oil.

  4.   If dishonesty and stupidity don’t mean anything to you, you won’t mind the above.

  5.   Iraq was a dangerous advancement in the power of the “Imperial Presidency” and a diminution in the influence of Congress and the American people. The irony is the war was led by the Republican Party, the party that in the past was renowned for its mythologizing the favoring of small government, and non-intervention in the entangling affairs of other countries. The opposite is true.

  6.   What the above means is that whereas America, even though it often didn’t do so in practice in the past, at least paid lip-service to the desirability of going to war only in defense. Instead, it now views war as a casual foreign policy tool. Any small, poor country whose leadership we don’t like for reasons true or false can be attacked and a million of its people killed. The American people and the Congress will go along with it whether it’s right or wrong. The appropriate justifications will always be made.

  7.   For example, let’s attack Cuba, a thorn-in-the-side of presidential administrations since 1960. It’s un-Democratic. Let’s kill a million Cubans in a war we start, and set up a friendly puppet regime that reinstates Mafia gambling. We can start the war by saying they were stockpiling secret weapons and then change the justification later when it’s proven otherwise.

  8.   Iraq proves that American Democracy is vulnerable, to a scheming, lying, crooked demagogue and his henchmen. We saw in Iraq, water-boarding torture of prisoners held without trial in secret camps in foreign countries, ignoring the Geneva Convention and illegal wire-tap spying of American citizens. It’s very possible that in the near future, with another unscrupulous president, if you’re a critic of the government, there could be a knock on your door at midnight, and you disappear.

  9.   Iraq was proof that in the end, Senator Joe McCarthy was the heart and soul of the real America, and that his chicanery was vindicated. It will be a country in which all you have to do to those with whom you disagree is to question their loyalty and brand them subversives. We have learned nothing from past mistakes. That comes with the corruption of unlimited power.

10.   Establishing Democracy by the use of force in an attack initiated by the Democracy, is not Democracy. It’s rather a Pseudo-Demo-Fascist-Hierarchy hybrid, in which the alleged benefits of freedom are enforced at the point of a gun, not choice, the freedom of which is central to the definition of a Democracy. In other words, an oxy-moron promoted by morons.

ALL OF THIS IS A VICTORY TO NEWSWEEK!

————————————————————————————————————————————————-

————————————————————————————————————————————————-

   Columnist – John Sammon
My gun is who I am. Love me. Love my gun. I R a patriot. I live where real Amer-cuns live. I be a member of the Thunderbolt Party. We wear German helmets and we carry the Bible and our guns.

We wear armbands with a thunderbolt on ‘em. Most of us are rural gas station attendants, the working class backbone of the country. Not some bunch of lily-livered limp wrists who like to think.

Love me love my gun.

I’m oiling my gun, waiting fer’ the day when weez’ gonna take back our coun-try.

When I get up in the morning, I thank God he made me a white man, not some socialist jig-a-boo communist co.’k-sucking faggot. Not some left-wing sissy whining momma’s-boy college-educated immigrant bastard.

You mess with me and I’ll kill ya.’ That’s what a Republic should be. Not this here Demo-crappy (Democracy) all them faggots and darkies and the traitors been coming over here to infect it been sayin.’

Love my gun. My gun I keep on the wall in a-place-o honor. I take it off the wall and keep it next to me in my bed. My gun is unregistered. You try to take my gun away an I’ll kill ya.’

I can shoot my own shoes off without nickin’ the skin if I need to, or part the hair on a sparrow at 300 yards.

We’re gonna have us a meetin’ where we talk about how to git back at them communist socialist bastard elected officials who don’t think our way and their immigrant faggot friends. Tryin’ to socialize us and forcing us take health insurance and abortions and such. We learn how to make threatening phone calls to their wives and children.

How to dump nails in their driveway.

Or worse.

If that don’t scare ‘em off, we have other means. We in the Thunderbolt Party.

Love me. Love my gun. Kiss my gun.

Any real man huntz with a gun. Any real American man like Dick Cheney, or that guy who was in the movie where he wuz’ the old Jew-boy with the beard (Charlton Heston as Moses).

Weez’ related to the founders of this country who shot the sh.’t outta the Indians, who made our God the God over ‘em and cleared the land and made it work. And then them foreign traitors come over here and try and take it away. And people of minorities and lesbians who get uppity and don’t know their place start whining and the political sonsofbitches left-wing traitors like Kennedy and Roosevelt suck up to ‘em.

Not me. They can kiss my ass. Love me. Love my gun.

I be a tea-bag right-wing patriot, and I’m proud of it.

I jus love to polish my gun and to hold it in my hands because the day of reckoning iz-a-comin.’

If they keep a-lectin’ them traitor faggots then we in the Thunderbolt Party will meet and think about ways we kin’ take our country back. A country where a white man and woman can walk down the street.

I have my gun. I love my gun.

To arms! To arms! We’re tea baggers, but we ain’t throwin’ no tea this time.

You jus’ watch what we do.

Love me. Love my gun.

————————————————————————————————————————————————-

————————————————————————————————————————————————-

This is ludicrous.

This is America.

Only the country that gave you American Idol would be capable of this.

The head general in the Afghanistan War went on Afghan TV to apologize to the Afghan people for killing innocent bystanders caught in the crossfire of the recent fighting. What does this be-medaled dolt think war is? It’s killing.

We killed half a million people in Iraq. Go on TV and say, gee, I’m sorry, as if a television apology makes it alright.

This is truly Beyond The Valley of Orwell. The ultimate extension of the TV generation into madness. I’m sorry we’re killing your people who are innocent of anything more than being in the wrong place, but you see we have to do it. Okay?

What is the Afghan citizen watching the TV set living in the abject poverty of his mud hut supposed to say back to the TV screen to the foreign general? I accept your apology, go on with the killing?

Using television to try and absolve yourself of complicity in violent death as the world’s mightiest superpower attempts to impose its will on one of the poorest regions of the earth? There is a fantastic quality to it, men who claim to be leaders going about this business heedless and without the involvement of mind-numbed American people, who are so spaced from reality they can’t even see the insanity of it all. Attempting to make war acceptable to a television audience in which members of that audience are some of the ones being victimized.

“We pause for station identification.” POW! BLAM! The roof caves in and buries you and your TV set. I’m sorry. You were in the way. What ever happened to the slogan “War is hell?”

I’ve got an idea. Why don’t we send text messages to the families of innocent people killed that say, I’m sorry your loved one got his head blown off. Then sign it, General Bullright.

It’s madness. Lunacy. The people running this country have syphilis of the brain. A nine-year open-ended war that will go on forever in which a conventional army with sophisticated weapons fights a ragged insurgency in which the bad guys don’t even have shoes on their feet. Can we win? Are we proud?

I know I know. They’re all evil and we’re all pure and righteous and blameless for whatever happens.

This is in actuality a first. Never before in recorded history has a general gone on television to ask the natives of a country with a much lower standard of living than the country the general represents, to understand and be patient with the general and his forces for destroying a part of that impoverished country. If it wasn’t tragic, this could be a comedy.

Conventional wisdom is that a conventional army captures and occupies territory (or a town) and installs a friendly regime. The insurgency, faced with an opponent with overwhelming superiority in firepower and weapons, disperses into remote areas and waits out the occupation while continuing hit-and-run attacks. Because the conventional army occupies ground and drives the other force off the battlefield, they (conventional army) claim victory, or progress maybe.

The insurgency simply moves off and takes up new positions and hunkers down to wait as they have through ten previous invasions going as far back as the Romans under Mark Anthony. If we capture one of their leaders, a new one steps up.
Perhaps we can go on TV and ask them to surrender.

YOU MORONS!

————————————————————————————————————————————————-

————————————————————————————————————————————————-

   Columnist – John Sammon
Tiger, you don’t have to apologize. Don’t hang your head in front of a national audience. You can date and fool around with whom ever you want to, and if the fans don’t like it, FU.’K ‘EM!

You’re not an elected official with a constituency that you owe allegiance to. You’re a private citizen just like me. That means that you don’t owe anything to any fu.’kin-body. If you want to fool around with women, some of whom are gold diggers, that’s your right as a free American citizen.

The quality of how you play golf has nothing to do with your off-time where you can come and go as you please. There is nothing illegal about cheating on your wife. I’m not saying it’s right, but that’s an issue between you and your wife.

Since when did the American people, and in particular golf fans, become the stewards of your private right to take up relations with anybody you want?

If the fans don’t like it, fu.’k ‘em!

What are they gonna do, force you off the golf course? Let’s say all the endorsements totaling millions dry up because the sponsors don’t like your off-the-course night life. You’ve already got more money than you need as long as you hang on to some of it, and don’t let the gold diggers clean you out.

If the sponsors don’t like it, fu.’k ‘em!

The fans are hypocrites. They cheat on their wives many of them. Some do drugs. Some steal and cheat on their taxes. Those things are illegal. I’m not saying it’s right. Do they go before the camera to beg an apology?

Be like Jack Johnson, the first black heavyweight champion boxer. Way back in 1910, he told white racist America to go fu.’k themselves. He would fool around with white women because he liked white women, and if people didn’t like it, they could F themselves. He did jail time because of it and this July is the 100th anniversary of his ring victory over the old has-been Jim Jeffries. There’s talk of getting Jackson’s jail conviction overturned because it was a racist frame-up.

Johnson said, and this could have gotten him lynched, that nobody had the right to dictate who he could date, or marry. Tiger, you should say the same thing. I’m kind of ashamed of you that you did this because your private life is your own (excuse the pun) affair.

Since cheating on your wife and seeing other women is not illegal, what are you guilty of? Unfaithfulness to your wife. Oh, let’s all gasp. Nobody else does that. That’s terrible.

Infidelity. That’s not illegal. The former president Clinton did that.

You’re an athlete. You attract a lot of hangers-on and sycophant-slaves and gold diggers after your money and fame. You have an inherent right to be not only the greatest golfer in the world, but one of the world’s greatest lovers.

Stand up for your rights.

The American people didn’t care that we killed a half million people in Iraq over nothing. Why should they care about this?

Is it because of your race that the racist white-only golf community wants to make an example of you?

Tiger Woods Apologizes

Comedian Jimmy Kimmel’s Take

..and the Tiger Who Ate Siegfried and Roy

————————————————————————————————————————————————-

————————————————————————————————————————————————-

   Columnist – John Sammon
He butters his bread with a pudgy hand. Dick Cheney is a patriot. That’s what he calls himself. He is the only one who openly calls himself a patriot.

Others may have called him a patriot once in awhile, only because they were on a government payroll, and their sycophant slave jobs demanded they suck up to Cheney.

In the morning, before entering his limousine for a ride downtown, he removes his silk monogrammed pajamas to take a shower. They are the expensive silk monogrammed pajamas of a patriot.

He’s a patriot. He’ll tell you so.

He’s a patriot who’s never ventured near a front line, and when 9-11 happened, he took shelter in an underground bunker. Unlike others, he’s too valuable to lose. Dick doesn’t believe in leading from the front. Dick lets others face the bullets while he hides.

He’s a patriot.

Dick is a professional schemer. It’s his one great virtuoso art, in addition to being a self-proclaimed patriot. Government, like the crooked corporate board room, is a fertile ground for schemers. Dick is among the best. He learned how to scheme back in the Watergate days as a professional “yes-hatchet man.” Scheming is an art. Some do it better than others.

Dick is a Picasso at scheming.

In government, scheming is highly valued by some people, as well as numbers crunching and paper shuffling and underling delegating or underling bullet biting (letting underlings take the blame away from Cheney).

He hasn’t an idealistic bone in his rotund body. That’s if scheming and the almost innate instinctive ability he has to advance himself, to look out for number one, to always profit, to always put himself first, like a cat who always lands on its feet, don’t count as idealism.

In fact, on more than one occasion, he’s actually defied gravity. Most other people who fail suffer for it. Dick can commit an impeachable offense, get away with it, and get promoted higher up the ladder.

But it’s not idealism.

You see, for something to qualify as idealism as defined in the dictionary, it usually has to be for a goal that is considered worthy. Chicanery is not usually considered worthy, and not idealism.

Dick is not an idealist.

Dick is a patriot. He’ll tell you he is.

He softly pads his chubby white feet toward the shower over his expensive shag rug. It’s the expansive installed shag rug of a patriot. He’s a patriot.

Dick has to take heart medicine because he has spent so much time scheming, counting money, avoiding military service, and so little time doing anything of a physical nature. He’s never been to a supermarket to buy food. Somebody else does that for him. Everybody does everything else for him, like buying embossed toilet paper. While he schemes.

He doesn’t scheme as much nowadays now that he’s out of office. These days he more often appears at press clubs or political meetings where he can act like he’s still in office and where he can act the big guy and accuse people who disagree with him of treachery. He says those people are not patriots.

Dick’s big alright. But it’s fat.

He’s a patriot, a patriot who unlike the patriot George Washington, is physically unable to even mount a horse. It’s good for him that he avoids physical things because he went out one time with a rich lawyer crony friend and accidentally shot the poor man in the face. Dick is a patriot who unlike the Minutemen, can’t handle a gun.

He moves from his shower and dons his $3,000 custom-tailored pair of Givenchy slacks. The reason Dick has so much in common with common people who have to wear bargain basement slacks they bought at Target Store is that he understand their problems. He’s a patriot after all, a patriot who wears dress shoes made of the finest Italian leather. Dick feels the good life is owed him because he sacrificed and served the country. Riding around in limousines and acting the big guy is serving the country.

He’ll tell you. He’s a patriot.

He’s a liar as well as a patriot. Dick learned that to survive in the cutthroat world of politics, you need to be an artful liar, and to keep lying, and then to lie again when challenged that you lie. He’s also a mean spirit who’s not averse to telling someone “f..’ck you!” As he did to one congressman.

It’s lucky for Dick he doesn’t have to defend his abusive words with action, with his fists, because he’d collapse with a heart attack.

He’s fat. A fat patriot.

If he had ever endured any hardship in life, he’d be thinner.

WAR CRIMINAL Dick Cheney Rewrites History For HIMSELF

Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

————————————————————————————————————————————————-

————————————————————————————————————————————————-